states their position and how it has affected them; others
listen attentively and respectfully without interruption
in turn repeats or describes as best they can the other's
position to the listener's satisfaction (c.f. Franklin
Covey's fifth habit "Seek first to understand, then to be
tries to view the issue from other points of view beside the
two conflicting ones
brain storms to find the middle ground, a point of balance,
creative solutions, etc.
volunteers what he or she can do to resolve the conflict or
solve the problem
A formal agreement is drawn with agreed-upon actions for both
A procedure is identified should disagreement arise
Progress is monitored
Progress rewarded or celebrated
Each party in collaborative conflict resolution should feel empowered to speak their mind, feel listened to, and
feel they are a critical part of the solution. So also, each is
obligated to respect and listen to others, try to understand their
point of view; and actively work toward a mutual decision.
If the conflict cannot be resolved in this manner,
mediation by a third, neutral party (as in peer mediation); or
arbitration (enforced resolution by a neutral authority) are options
Education is an excellent setting to learn problem
solving and conflict resolution strategies.
Whether the conflict is a classroom real-life simulation exercise or an
on-going emotional experience, learning ways to resolve issues and
collaboratively work through responses and solutions will teach you skills
that can be applied in other settings. It can help you:
recognize mutual interests
improve persuasion skills
improve listening skills
break the re-active cycle or routine
learn to disagree without animosity
build confidence in recognizing win-win
recognize/admit to/process anger and other
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